Book Review

Dyke Life

In 1995, a gay Lambda Literary Award (Lammy) was given for the book Dyke Life (edited by Dr. Karla Jay, Director of Women’s studies at Pace University, and a lesbian; see the gay journal, Lambda Book Report, July 1996, pg. 8 for notice of the award).

In Dyke Life, lesbian physician Dr. Karen F. Kerner admits that the gay-heterosexual phenomenon is difficult for lesbians to discuss. She quotes Amber Hollibaugh, director of the Lesbian AIDS Project for the Gay Men’s Health Crisis: “…it’s very controversial,” Hollibaugh says, for lesbians to talk about having sex with men. But in this book, such an example is highlighted. (For the above quote, see Dyke Life, ed. by Karla Jay; New York: Basic Books, 1995, pg. 320)

One lesbian, Greta Gaard, tells about a mountain climbing expedition during which she began a sexual affair with a male climber, “Dave”:
“When the trip ended, we drove home across South Dakota, laughing lustily and singing along with a song by Two Nice Girls—something about how one woman’s queer life had been complicated by the love of a strong man.” (Ibid., pg. 261; Gaard is a professor at the University of Minnesota)

When they arrived back home, “The climate chilled for more reasons than autumn.” As the news of her heterosexual affair spread (and a former lesbian lover called to confirm the rumor), Greta: “felt suddenly watched, judged. While queers worried about hiding their sexualities in this homophobic little town, my concerns went the other way. I didn’t want the lesbian community I still cared about to monitor me holding hands with Dave, laughing with him, having breakfast.” (Ibid.)

Then, Greta tells of going to a lesbian coffee house, deliberately alone: “Women still spoke to me there, but they never asked about my personal life—a strange omission in a town of that size. Of course, they knew.” (Ibid.)

But sex with men has its drawbacks—diseases which are transmitted sexually. This problem was part of a public lesbian discussion in Washington, DC: “Lesbians from across the country and as far away as London crowded into a church sanctuary in the nation’s capital on Saturday for a spirited discussion about their lives.” (The Washington Blade, 6-5-99, pg. 14)

A panel of seven lesbians addressed various issues, as part of this initiative by the “Collective Lesbians of African-Descent Voices Everywhere” (CLOAVE). One of the panelists was Denise Bentley, “associate director of health promotion at the Fenway Community Health Center in Boston.” Bentley cautioned that:
“…too few Lesbians of color discuss the fact that some of them still have sexual relationships with men. As Lesbians of color recognize and talk about the fact that sometimes our sexuality is a fluid thing, they will begin to protect themselves.’” (Ibid.)

Until then, Bentley says: “’…we will continue to become sick, continue to transmit sexually transmitted diseases and HIV infection.’” (Ibid.)

Other nationally-known panelists included Pamela Birchett, “a program coordinator at the Sexual Minority Youth Assistance league,” (SMYAL) and Nadine Smith, “founder and executive director of Equality Florida, a grassroots, statewide organization…” (Ibid.) Not one of the other panelists objected to the talk of sexual “fluidity” or sex with men.

Dyke Life gives specifics of this disease problem, starting with adolescent behavior among “lesbian” girls and “gay” boys:
“At the same time, the smug assumption that we have one of the lowest rates of AIDS obliterates the reality that lesbian adolescents, who tend to have sex with their gay male friends, have an alarmingly high rate of AIDS…” (Dyke Life, pg. 6)

Preliminary data from a pilot study conducted at the HIV Center for Clinical and Behavioral Studies in New York City suggest that lesbian- and bisexual-identified adolescents are at high risk for several reasons. Fifteen out of twenty adolescent girls who identify as lesbians report having both male and female partners.

The male partners are often bisexual or gay friends of theirs…Another study at the HIV Center found that approximately half of gay male adolescents engage in intercourse with girls, and also that they are far less likely to use condoms with their female partners than with their male partners. These data confirm clinicians’ impressions that many lesbian adolescents engage in heterosexual behavior, sometimes with multiple partners, rarely with condoms, and sometimes with the intention of becoming pregnant. (Ibid., pg. 57)

Why do these “gay” adolescents have HIV (the virus which causes AIDS), at such a young age? Lesbian journalist Victoria Brownworth has done an extensive article on this subject for The Advocate. Brownworth gives her no-holds-barred assessment:
“And our community, the gay and lesbian community—and I particularly fault gay men here—has done nothing to try and help our youth. Gay men view these boys as recreational toys to be used. I have heard many stories of HIV-positive men having unprotected sex with boys. They don’t think it matters.” (The Advocate, 3-24-92, pg. 41)

One of these boys is David Kamens, who tells his own story of being exploited and infected by older gay men:
“He began going to gay bars at 14 and having unprotected casual sex with older men. At 16, he got sick and was diagnosed with AIDS…” (Ibid., pg. 42)

But why did Kamens engage in this dangerous behavior with adult gay men?
“A lot of the time I was having sex, what I really wanted was love, to be cared for, to belong. And I don’t see, from what other kids tell me, that much has changed.’” (Ibid.)

Lesbian physician, Dr. Karen F. Kerner adds to the discussion, this time speaking of adults—lesbians having sex with men—even gay men:
“Women who identify as lesbian but also have sex with men are often hesitant to admit it; thus they deny their contact with a potential reservoir of AIDS and other STDs. Because of fear of being labeled politically incorrect…these women may keep quiet about their heterosexual activity. Several recent studies from the United States and Europe reported a significant percentage of women partnering with women who had unprotected consensual sex with men in the preceding three years. Not surprisingly, many of these men were close friends and were gay… According to Joyce Hunter, president of the National Lesbian and Gay HealthFoundation, lesbian adolescents were especially likely to have anal intercourse with their gay male teenage friends.” (Dyke Life, pgs. 321, 323)